“Dinner was great, except for…”

“Our trip was amazing, but I wish…”

“He’s a good guy, however, he tends to…”

We all do it. We can’t help it. We nitpick. No matter the person, place, thing, or experience, we find some way it could have been better. To some degree it’s harmless and sometimes even constructive. But, it’s also a nasty habit.

I do it all the time. In fact, I do it subconsciously with nearly everything I consume or experience. I can’t help but think of how something could have been better, even if it was already good. I critique and dwell on whatever flaws I can find, no matter how small. Sometimes I like to think that I’m striving for improvement, but that’s rarely the case. The truth is that I’m seeking out the negatives, instead of simply enjoying the positives.

The punchline is that nothing will ever be perfect. We all know this. We all say this. But then we all turn right around and nitpick something’s imperfections. Maybe you had an amazing dinner with your friends, but then you can’t help but point out how bad parking was at the restaurant. Your vacation was wonderful and relaxing, but you also have to acknowledge that your flights were inconvenient. You genuinely like your new coworker, but you’d also like him better if he was a little less chatty.

The reality is that nothing is or ever will be perfect. Things just are. Every person, place, and event possess hundreds of unique qualities and generally the good outnumber the bad. You can move that dinner to a restaurant with better parking, but you won’t recreate the exact same vibe. You can travel on different days for your next vacation, but that doesn’t mean everything else will remain unchanged from your trip. That coworker could be less chatty, but you’d also find fault if he was more of an introvert.

It’s a nasty habit to break and it’s something I have to work at each day. It often feels second nature to nitpick, but simply appreciating things for their uniqueness is an easier and much more pleasant way to consume life. You can think of how everything can or could be perfect, but accepting that it never will be is a cornerstone to happiness. The less time you spend dwelling on something’s flaws, the more time you’ll spend enjoying everything that made it special. You, your job, your life, your partner, your experiences, none of them will ever be perfect, and they were never supposed to be.