“And lastly, let me show you the Quiet Room and Sauna.”

My wife and I followed the attendant back through the spa to a door with a large, center cut window. Through the door was a wooden room with a bench. It was like a sauna but without the heat. In fact, that’s exactly what it was.

“This is the Quiet Room. After you’ve tried all the spa offerings, sometimes it’s nice to come in here and sit quietly.”

She smiled, then led us back to the entrance. Once there, she gave us towels and robes and assigned us chairs by the pool. She then left us with her final instruction to “enjoy the day”.

The place was five stars by all accounts. It was a nationally recognized spa and resort and it had lived up to the hype. It was day one of our honeymoon and this was the perfect environment to relax and let the chaos of wedding planning fade from our memories. However, as I sipped my beer and tried to read, I couldn’t get my mind off the Quiet Room.

Not that I was a connoisseur of spas, but this place appeared to have everything. There were two outdoor pools, one was cool and one was warm. There was a third pool in a cave-like enclosure which had multiple waterfalls of varying size and strength. There was a sauna, a steam room, and a cold plunge. We were also scheduled for the massage lounge later in the afternoon. And, there was the Quiet Room.

The spa was exquisite and all its luxuries were superb. There was no argument. But, the Quiet Room was bullshit. Now, I didn’t mind the Quiet Room. I had nothing against it. But, it was incorporated into the tour and shown among the other great amenities, yet it was nothing more than a heatless sauna. It was a room with a wooden bench.  It was ridiculous.  It was bullshit. 

The Quiet Room didn’t detract from my enjoyment of the facility. And, I can’t say it necessarily changed my opinion of the place. However, it was a good reminder. Everything comes with a little bullshit. Things will always be oversold. The person on the resume is always slightly better than the real thing. The remodel will always take longer than you were told. The device won’t work as well as it did in the commercial. It’s not always malicious, but things will forever be polished slightly beyond the truth. No matter how much it glitters, it’s never pure gold.