I work out a lot. I’m one of those people. I don’t have a set routine or even a regular schedule, but barring any significant conflicts, I do something about everyday. I’ve done it for so long that it’s become a normal piece of my daily regimen. It’s just something I do. I’ll never stop. I’ll never lack the motivation.

Personal trainers have always baffled me. Not the premise of a trainer, I get that. Having a professional instruct you through a new thing makes sense. What I’ve never understood is the continual use of a trainer. I’ve never related with the people who use one for years. I’ve never understood the common explanation that, “Using a trainer is the only way I can get myself to workout”.

That’s the part I could never wrap my head around; the fact people would need to spend thousands of dollars to create enough guilt riddled pressure that they’d feel obligated to work out. I never understood why they didn’t go to a few sessions with a trainer and then do the workouts on their own. My attitude towards fitness made this mindset inconceivable.

What’s silly is that while I held this attitude, I wasn’t pushing myself in other areas of my life. I wasn’t attacking goals that I claimed were important. The natural motivation I had to workout didn’t transfer as easily at my job, in my relationships, or with other personal objectives. In that sense, I was a hypocrite.

At work, I was fulfilling my requirements and doing what was expected of me. My bosses were pleased. But, I wasn’t pushing myself. At home, I was a good man and good father, but I can’t say I was specifically focused on becoming better. On my own time, I had a goal of being a writer, but I didn’t treat it as a priority.

The sobering truth was that I lacked the fortitude to push myself to the next level. It’s no different than those people with trainers who I silently mocked. They needed something to push them because they couldn’t do it themselves. I needed something to push me in areas I claimed were important. I needed a reality check.

What’s the answer? I’m not sure. Addressing it is a start. Re-prioritizing my time and renewing my focus has been the next step. But, it’s a process. It’s about new habits and new behaviors. They don’t happen overnight, nor can they be established and forgotten. Each day is a new opportunity to work at what I claim is important. It’s hard and it takes work. In fact, a trainer would be kind of nice.