“Hello?”

“Hey, man. What’s happening?’

“Nothing. What’s up?”

“Nothing. So, you know what I can’t stand?”

“What’s that?”

“When someone transfers their burden onto you.”

“Does this happen to you a lot?”

“I wouldn’t say a lot, but more than you’d think. I bet you deal with it as well.”

“I’m not sure I agree with you.”

“Yeah, you do. You just don’t realize it.”

“How so?”

“Well, let me give you my example. So, we’re at home the other evening and it’s probably about an hour before my wife and I go to bed. I’m watching TV and she’s messing in the kitchen. She then leaves to go back to the bedroom and in passing tells me, ‘Don’t let me forget to put away those strawberries on the counter’.”

“Is that it?”

“Yes. She said that and then left with very little intention of returning.”

“So?”

“So? So, why are the strawberries now my responsibility? If they need to be put in the fridge, just put them in the fridge. Instead, she transferred the burden to me. It’s now my responsibility to remind her. If they don’t make it to the fridge, I’ll share the blame for not reminding her.”

“Yeah, but is it that hard to remind her?”

“Hard? No, it isn’t. But, it’s also not hard for her to just do it. Instead, I’ve been given a nonessential job in order to remove some of the responsibility from her. It’s kind of lazy if you ask me.”

“So, you don’t think this request should be made?”

“No. Or, at least if you do make it, it should have no binding effect.”

“But this request did? What happened?”

“I forgot to tell her. And, she left the strawberries out.”

“Rut roh.”

“Yeah, and the next morning she was annoyed because ‘we’ forgot to put the strawberries in the fridge.”

“So, it was your fault?”

“Partially, yes. It was ridiculous. I didn’t ask for that. They weren’t my strawberries.”

“Why didn’t she just put them away when she mentioned it to you?”

“I asked the same thing. Apparently, they needed to dry.”

“Ahh. So, she washed them, but it was then on you to remember to put them away?”

“Apparently. Like, who does that?”

“I get it. I’m starting to see your point.”

“Right? I mean, it’s the worst. ‘Don’t let me forget…’ ‘Remind me to…’. It’s horrible.”

“I hear you. Like, instead, why don’t you just write it down? Or, make a note for yourself? Or, set a timer?”

“Exactly. People feel it is OK to rope others into a responsibility for something they don’t want to deal with themselves. When did society decide this was OK?”

“It’s criminal. And, you were right. It does happen more than I realized. Last week, my boss needed to email a client before day’s end and while we were out on a call, he asked that I remind him to do it later when we get back to the office.”

“And what happened?”

“We both forgot.”

“And?”

“The next day he told the client that ‘we’ forgot.”

“See? ‘We’. ‘We’ forgot. As if you shared in the blame.”

“Son a bitch. I didn’t even think of it at the time, but that’s exactly it.”

“I knew you’d get it.”

“You know what the solution is?”

“What?”

“Ask them to remind you to not forget to remind them. Like, go one more layer down and put it back on them.”

“And then they have two things to remember.”

“Exactly. Try it next time and see how the wife likes that.”

“Genius.”

“Remember you heard it from me.”

“Don’t let me forget.”